New Virus Releases

Oprah Winfrey Virus: Your 200 GB hard drive suddenly shrinks to 80 GB, but then slowly expands back to 200 GB.

AT&T Virus: Every three minutes it tells you what great service you are getting.

MCI Virus: Every three minutes it reminds you that you are paying too much for the AT&T Virus.

Paul Revere Virus: This revolutionary virus does not horse around. It warns you of impending hard disk attack: once if by LAN, twice if by C:>.

Politically Correct Virus: Never calls itself a "virus," but instead refers to itself as an "electronic microorganism."

Ross Perot Virus: Activates every component in your system, just before the whole darn thing quits.

Mario Cuomo Virus: It would be a great virus, but it refuses to run.

Ted Turner Virus: Colorizes your old monochrome monitor.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Virus: Terminates your session and then disappears. It'll be back.

Dan Quayle Virus: Thers sumthin rong wit yur komputerw butt ewe jsut cant figyour it out!

Government Economist Virus: Nothing works, but all your diagnostic software says everything is fine.

Gallup Virus: Sixty percent of the PCs infected will lose 38 percent of their data 14 percent of the time (plus or minus a 3.5 percent margin of error).

Texas Virus: Makes sure that it's bigger than any other file.

Airline Virus: You're in Dallas, but your data ends up in Singapore.

November 2004

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